Milan Striker Fails Drugs Test; Blames Slutty Girlfriend

By: Martha | January 17th, 2007

Sweet, STD-laden Belen Rodriguez.Little-used Milan striker Marco Borriello faces a lengthy ban after testing positive for illegal substances (again) yesterday. His first positive test occurred immediately after the club’s November 11 loss to Roma, and he was provisionally suspended pending testing of his B sample — that’s the one which just turned up positive. The club is sure, however, that things will be cleared up right quick, and that Borriello will be back in the side in no time.

What’s their secret? Well, according to Borriello’s girlfriend Belen Rodriguez (Why yes, she is a model. Did you even have to ask?), the problem stems not from doping but from sex: She sort of accidentally gave him an STD, and the cream he was directed to rub on his manly bits to make it go away (Read: Kill the crabs.) contained cortisone, which is on the list of banned substances. Oops. On, like, six different levels.

Man, this is even better than Mrs. Oddo’s fevered reproductive organs keeping her husband in Milan! Borriello is probably glad he’s suspended, because training after that little revelation would be a treat and a half.

[Thanks to Ashley for the link to the Sun story.]






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Comments  

  • Muddia Dome |  January 17th, 2007 at 1:47 pm

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    Awesome shot Martha, but we still get a WAG of the Week post later this week as well, right?

    The only thing that could make that story funnier is if a Milan player vouches that he helped apply the ointment.

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  • Martha |  January 17th, 2007 at 2:00 pm

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    But of course, Muddia! (Stories about STDs simply demand bonus WAG photos.)

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  • Ashley |  January 17th, 2007 at 3:14 pm

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    while it sure is a great pic, I don’t think that is his gf! Check out the link below for the two of them gettin’ friskie on a public beach! Can anyone say they are surprised by this news?

    http://sport.tiscali.it/gossip/05/12/21/belen_borriello.html

    Posted from United States

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  • Ashley |  January 17th, 2007 at 3:16 pm

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    Actually this one is WAY better and really gives you a sense of how this could happen…

    http://www.ohlalaparis.com/ohlalaparis/2006/01/cristian_arriet.html

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  • roswitha |  January 17th, 2007 at 9:23 pm

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    * laughs. so. hard. *

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  • Ana |  January 18th, 2007 at 1:26 pm

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    oh my gosh! Shes classy. this story is so funny/probably really embarrasing!

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  • Week 3: The Return of the Bobo (Oh, and Roma Go Top) - Adriano - The Offside - Serie A Italian Football Blog |  September 17th, 2007 at 5:00 am | Pingback

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    [...] 2-2 Genoa-Livorno 1-1: Hey look, a goal by That Guy With the Skanky Girlfriend! Inter-Catania 2-0: Cesar, who obviously trained at Inter this summer only because he’d not [...]

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  • WAG of the Week: Belen Rodriguez - Bobo Vieri - The Offside - Serie A Italian Football Blog |  January 24th, 2008 at 3:01 pm | Pingback

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    [...] Rodriguez shot to “fame” in Italy last year when it was revealed it was her STD meds that made boyfriend Marco Borriello test positive for steroids. Oops. Not to worry, though, [...]

    Posted from United States United States

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  • A Mercato Musical - Video Of The Day - The Offside - AS Roma Calcio Blog |  March 25th, 2008 at 4:17 pm | Pingback

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    [...] not a huge shocker when you get suspended for a drug violation when that drug happened to be your girlfriend’s STD cream. I swear, man…..some [...]

    Posted from United States United States

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