News Not Involving Inter

By: chris | March 13th, 2008

Because it’s been their week. Move aside.

• A real coaching vacancy was filled. The Cupernator made his illustrious return to the peninsula this weekend to fill in for Mimmo Di Carlo and fight the good fight. Like Claudio Ranieri last year (maybe they should be handing out 6 month contracts?), Hector Cuper will try to work wonders and keep the Gialloblu afloat for another year. Only this year Beppe Rossi is in Spain. Early prediction: they stay up.

• Early breaking news: someone at Milan is talking about Sheva! First it was Silvio, who probably still calls Andriy nightly and refuses to accept that they ever broke up in the first place, and then Rino, who gets to do whatever the hell he wants to do because he’s Gennaro fucking Gattuso. (Got it?)

• Pablo Piatti, who makes Ludovic Giuly look like Manute Bol, is calling out for some love from Juve, saying he’s their answer to Pato. Apparently he’s never heard of Sebastian Giovinco, who is (probably) better and just as short as you are, little man.

• Arrigo Sacchi has some nice praise for Daniele De Rossi:

“When I was at Real Madrid I wanted to buy De Rossi. But Florentino Perez told me that in his Real [Madrid] he only wanted players who had just won a Golden Ball. So I answered that he would win one in the future, and the facts are giving me reason to believe that this will happen.”

And of course neglects to mention that it would be over Rosella Sensi’s lifeless body that DDR would be sold. (I take things regarding Daniele De Rossi personally, for some odd reason. Kind of like Martha and Figo - and Zlatan - and Bobo - and Corini.)

• Hey, speaking of Corini (I knew I’d find a segue eventually), Torino is being smart and looking for somebody else to come in fill his boots in case he breaks a hip or something. Being that this is Torino, they require that you be either ancient or have played for Palermo at one point. Enter Fabio Liverani and Serio Volpi, who will be 32 and 34 respectively next year. Sounds about right.

• Maybe I’ve been out of the Felipe Melo loop, but he’s going to join a “big italian team” and that undoubtedly means Fiorentina (well duh). Attacking mid, plays in Spain. Woo.

• The ageless wonder that is Berto Fontana has put ink to paper on a one year contract extension, meaning he’ll be 42 and still taking names, and putting off his inevitable move to Torino for at least one more year. (40 year old Palermo players must make Fabio Lupo sweat like a teenage boy in the girls locker room.)

• Speaking of goalkeeper extensions, Gigi Buffon has extended his undoubtedly modest contract until 2013. Come on - he’s a lifer in stripes. I know it, you know it, they know it. News schmews.

• Marcelo Zalayeta has done gone and put himself out of competition for the year with a knee that went through the proverbial meat grinder. Enter Emanuele Calaio, that guy who’s really fucking good but nobody at Napoli knows it. (Or chooses to ignore it.)

• Milan would supposedly like some Ivan Pelizzoli action. Right.

• And there are two new bloggers in the house: Fortunato has joined Joe at the Napoli offside, and Udinese is finally being represented by Jason. Bout damn time. Go welcome them and stuff.