Week 21, Or: A Headbutt and Another Win for Inter

By: Martha | January 29th, 2007

Maicon n Friends Until now, Inter have been winning by overpowering opponents with their superior ability, so there was always a chance of a slip-up. Now that we know they can win by manipulating the brains of opponents and forcing them into headbutts, however, there’s no limit to what they can accomplish. I mean, who knows what other secret skills they’ve been hiding from us? Perhaps next week, when the team starts to struggle against Roma, we’ll find out that Ibra can fly. Or that Adriano has an Inspector Gadget-style neck which, when necessary, enables him to get his head on crosses that come in as much as 20 feet off the ground. Put simply: They’re not going to drop another point, possibly ever. (And that’s a fact, not an opinion, apparently, because according to Corriere dello Sport, some bookies are already paying off on them winning the title. Damn.)

Not that Inter need superpowers to take the title — they remain 11 points clear at the top of the table, and neither Roma (who managed an unimpressive win) nor Palermo (who drew) are showing signs of making up any ground. That said, the races for the European spots continue to heat up: Lazio and Catania are tied on 30 points for fourth, while Empoli, Udine, Atlanta and Milan (!) are all lumped together right behind them. At the other end of the table, meanwhile, Ascoli — who managed their second win this week! — may as well quit now. Just ahead of them are Parma, Messina and Reggina (who, you may recall, have already made up 11 points and are headed quite confidently for safety).

Full results are after the jump.

Atalanta – Catania 1-1: I don’t know exactly what went down here, but after the game I saw at least two players wandering around the pitch wearing nothing but black briefs. Clearly they celebrate draws differently up north.
Cagliari – Reggina 0-2
Chievo – Empoli 0-0
Fiorentina – Livorno 2-1
Messina – Ascoli 1-2: No, that is not a typo. Go Ascoli, go Ascoli!
Milan – Parma 1-0
Palermo – Lazio 0-3
Roma – Siena 1-0
Sampdoria – Inter 0-2
Torino – Udinese 2-3: Not only was the game exciting, but Torino’s Gabriele Cioffi shoved a referee after he was sent off. Woo hoo! I’ve not checked yet to see if the ref took a dive, Paul Alcock style (the linked video, by the way, is well-worth watching, both for the use of the term “handbags” and a glimpse towards the end of the utterly magnificent Danny Wilson), but even without any playacting Cioffi is surely in for a hefty suspension.