Zlatan Death Threat!

By: Martha | October 19th, 2007

Bow before me, minions.You heard it here first, people, Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s life will be in danger tomorrow night when he takes the pitch in Reggina. Or at least it will be if certain people have their way.

Reggina defender Salvatore Aronica has revealed to the press his secret plan for stopping the unstoppable Swede: Murder. Said, Aronica, “I’d need a gun to stop him.” Gosh, and all this time we’ve thought the danger was in the stands — maybe instead of banning supporters and Ultras, the FIGC need to start taking a look at certain speedy backs with homicidal urges, hmm?

Even if Aronica does go all Dick Cheney on Zlatan, though, Reggina are going to have their hands full with Inter. Having managed to secure only four points from the first seven games, Reggina aren’t exactly striking fear into anyone’s hearts, and are leaking goals like crazy, having given up more than everyone except for poor, useless Livorno. Of course, Inter will have about two healthy defenders available tomorrow, so if Reggina can get the ball forward you never know what’s going to happen.

Sorry. Can you tell there’s not much going on today?





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Comments  

  • roswitha |  October 19th, 2007 at 5:14 am

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    I’d hate to see that gun after Zlatan’s done with it.

    Posted from India India

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  • Martha |  October 19th, 2007 at 6:08 am

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    An angle I hadn’t considered, roswitha, but by far the best one.

    Posted from United States

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  • mele419 |  October 19th, 2007 at 7:18 am

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    I laugh at everyone that takes that as an actual death threat. = ]

    Posted from United States United States

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  • Martha |  October 19th, 2007 at 7:22 am

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    Yeah, I’m guessing there aren’t many. Also, as roswitha said, Zlatan would eat anyone who tried anything.

    Posted from United States

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  • Ginkers |  October 19th, 2007 at 7:51 am

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    Judging by Aronica’s prowess in front of goal, even if he did try to shoot Ibra he would probably miss…

    Posted from United Kingdom United Kingdom

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  • Martha |  October 19th, 2007 at 8:02 am

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    Nice. Best comment of the day award to Ginkers.

    Posted from United States

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  • chris |  October 19th, 2007 at 12:51 pm

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    Marth, have you seen this?

    http://www.uefa.com/trainingground/index.html#34004/2048/570507

    Posted from United States

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  • Martha |  October 19th, 2007 at 1:13 pm

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    Yeah, thanks Chris — my favorite part is the “You still gotta try it!” moment. I hope that’s in one of his tattoos, because it’s clearly his football philosophy.

    Posted from United States

    cornercorner

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